Dear Abu Fulaan,
Don’t just ignore Umm Fulaan when it is “that time of the month”. There is more to the menstrual bleeding than what you see…
*There is the cramping that can range from mild to severe, as the uterine muscles contract and relax to shed blood.
*There are mood swings associated with the hormonal changes during the menses. She may also have trouble concentrating, remembering things, or she may become more irritable.
*There is something called “menstrual poop” which means that she may need to go to the toilet more frequently because of the effect of prostaglandins (the same substances causing the uterine contractions) on the bowels.
*There is some degree of anxiety and stress involved in changing pads every now and then, trying not to get ‘stained’ in public, being careful of what to eat and drink, etc.
*There is that apprehension over the appearance of acne on her face, again, due to hormonal changes.
*The are times that she actually has increased libido and all she needs is some cuddles (as sex is haram)
*There is this feeling of “losing touch” with some ebaadah, such as fasting during Ramadan.
Menstruation is normal and natural. True.
But please, spare a moment and acknowledge her struggles during this period. From your office or shop, call her and check how she’s doing. Buy something she likes or treat her to a favourite meal/snack.
She will surely appreciate such gestures and love you even more.
“The best of you are the best (in character) to their wives” (Al-Hadith)