When I was growing up, my mum told me that pregnancy was no big deal and childbirth was like passing a hard stool after several days of constipation. I won’t say she lied; but it’s better to let ladies understand the mechanism of labour and the possible things to expect. Prepare your mind but expect the best. Pregnancy is not a child’s play and a baby’s head is in no way comparable to a hard stool: it’s harder!

Yeah, there are a few lucky women out there whom you will only see carrying a baby without suspecting that they were pregnant in the first place. Some have very high threshold for labour pains and they won’t bat an eyelid until the baby is delivered seamlessly. This is not the norm; it’s the exception.

I have peeped into a number of Facebook groups and other online forums for pregnant and nursing mums. While I commend the effort of the admins who are trying to create awareness and provide support for these women, I have a few reservations…

When some people share their experiences, they make it appear like that is exactly how it will be for everyone. No. If two sisters of the same mother get pregnant on the same day, their course and outcomes can differ greatly. Even in the same woman, each pregnancy is unique and different from previous/subsequent ones.

This is why we say that a safe delivery is a retrospective diagnosis. Our goal is to hand over a healthy baby to a healthy mother. We do our job, reassure the woman (and her family) and hope for the best. There are protocols and action plans but each patient must be individualized.

So, let’s be mindful of how we share information on these forums. It’s better to invite a experienced obstetrician or midwife to answer specific questions and give clarifications on grey areas. There is no “one-size-fits-all” when it comes to medical care in general and obstetric care in particular.

Wishing all expectant mothers safe delivery!


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