9 WAYS TO STAY CONNECTED WITH YOUR SPOUSE THIS RAMADAN.
1. Pray together.
Wake up before suhoor and observe a minimum of two rakahs together. If possible, go to the mosque for tarawih together. Once in a while, skip witr at the mosque so that you can say it together at home. Supplicate for each other in your local language.
2. Eat together.
There is barakah in suhoor; how much more when you eat together? Better still, eat from the same plate, at the same time.
Abu, go home and eat immediately after magrib, that’s not the appropriate time to start gisting with your friends!
Ummu, as much as you’re watching your weight, ditch the oatmeal once in a while and eat Semo with Abu; there is love in sharing!
3. Read together.
Choose a time for reciting, memorising and studying the meaning of the Quran. You can do this individually, but it sticks better when you study together. Select hadiths, stories of the Prophets etc. and discuss the lessons. If the children can join, the more the merrier.
4. Play together.
Ramadan is a time to recharge our faith. Does that preclude having some fun? No. In fact, Allaah (Subhaanahu wa Ta’ãla), stated it categorically, just a few verses after He commanded us to fast, that couples can have intimacy during the nights (Quran chapter 2 verse 187). However, care must be taken during the day. The Prophet (saw) used to kiss his wives while fasting but that’s because he could control his desires perfectly; not for every Talha, Dawood and Hamzah!!!
5. Be together.
If you have unclaimed leave at work, take it in Ramadan and be together. It’s easier to communicate more lovingly because you wouldn’t want to say anything hurtful when you know you’re fasting. It’s also easier to settle any scores between you, because you would have more control over your temper, in shaa Allaah.
6. Compete with each other.
Race to complete the Quran in a given number of days. Race to memorize ayãt, surahs, or juz’s of the Quran. Race to learn new ahadith. Set rewards and subtle punishments for achieving or failing to meet up with deadlines respectively. If you have kids, give them age-appropriate tasks too.
7. Cook together.
It’s not written anywhere that wives must do all the cooking. Abu, please, be chopping the vegetables while Ummu is pounding the yam. Attend to the baby while she’s stirring the Ogbono. Take the garbage out while she’s washing the dishes. You’re helping her save energy for other things and iftar will be ready in no time!
8. Go together.
A big sheikh is coming to town to deliver a lecture? Go together. A friend invited you to his house for iftar? Go together. You want to take advantage of Umrah in Ramadan? Go together (if you can afford the expenses). And yes, you can also go for i’tikaf together; especially where the mosque has adequate facilities for women and children.
9. Shop together.
Buying in bulk is more advisable so that you can save time for your ‘ebaadah. Hence, shopping together is more likely to help you so that you won’t leave out anything. If possible, buy everything you would need for zakatul fitr and the Eid celebration, all at a go.
May Allaah enrich our purses, strengthen our relationships and increase us in Emãn. Aameen.