You’re a 24/7 stay-at-home mum. Children are coming in biannually. You’ve given up on your quest for white-collar jobs. You don’t get enough sleep at night and each day gets crazier than the previous…

Sweetheart comes back from work and the million naira question pops up: what have you been doing since morning?

There’s usually no straightforward response like: “the food got burnt while I was busy changing the baby’s diaper, so I had to make another batch…”. (Because I know that the commonest reason for that question is late dinner, lol!) Instead, you get angry because he’s angry about the ONLY chore you’re unable to complete on that day…and then, the fight begins…..

Now, let me ask you the same question: what have you been doing? No, not since morning; WITH YOUR LIFE. Apart from being a homemaker, which is the most important and stressful job ever, what else are you doing? I’ve been there, and I know that even with the marathon chores, you still feel some pockets of emptiness in you. Even with the exhaustion from constant screaming at the kids, you still have some residual potentials with which you can make positive impart.

You complain that there’s no time? No. There is plenty of time. What is lacking is how to manage time. Don’t you find time to check your email, Facebook, Twitter, instagram, whatsapp etc.? Don’t you find time to gist with your next-door neighbour for several hours? Unless you’re homeschooling, you sure have some extra time once the kids are off to school.

You’re youthful and healthy: two of the bounties of Allaah which you’ll be asked to account for on yaomul qiyaamah. Ukhtee, stop wasting time! (And you too, akhee!) Rediscover yourself and maximise your time. Remember: Life Is Too Short (LITS).

Some suggestions:
*Read books on time management and personal development. Eg. Seven habits of highly effective people by Steven Covey.
*Enrol for online courses. Try Islamic Online University, Lynda.com, Coursera etc.
*If you’re good at creative writing, try blogging, publishing books etc.
*If you have entrepreneurial skills, and some money, start a business
*Join a volunteering cause for women, children, orphans etc.
*Try homeschooling. If you have a maid, homeschool her too.
(The list is not exhaustive)

Khadijah Sanni-Tijani


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